http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PWIuxIKBNA
Midnight is in my eyes..on my face... and on my soul...
Seeing the reflection on the window of the train... I could feel and sense the midnight... that is just in a doorstep...
Had a short quarrel with mom and had to sleep in silence the last night.. an uncomfortable silence in one room... I force myself for sleep as I had work today and had to leave in the morning as early as possible. I wanted to have ample time for gym before going for work. Woke up when it was 5:45. Mom prepared breakfast as usual and surprisingly, I wasn't tired at all.
Eating mom's sandwich in the morning is always somewhat suffering but needed. I wanted a heavy breakfast like that as it's the healthy diet that my friend Ikhwan made. However, having such heavy breakfast, and forcing myself for another bite was a true suffer.. I didn't like every bites..
Hardly finishing the meal, I quickly left for gym. It was around 6:10 then. Today, as forecasted by the weather forecast, was the coldest day of the year. Just when I was standing in front the door, I could feel the coldness of the winter outside. Left after saying bye to mom. Unlike how I'd thought, mom was still cold like the weather...
It was such suffering weather.... the only thought that would come when I was forwarding my bike to the gym... was that how I'd wish I was at home covering my body with blanket. The only thought that made me move on... is the thought of inputting myself a need for a strong mentality... Thinking of myself standing on the field at IJC... a great come back in front the crowds that knows me... Like some return of the legend.. Hoping to play the football game showing how changed I am, physically and skillfully.... Thinking of this exact detailed dream, I moved on..
As soon as I reached the gym, I quickly rushed for some bowel movements. This movements continued for about 2-3 times.. and got into a proper action for gym. Dreaming of being myself big..huge.. and fit..
Left for work when it was 8.. and took the train..
Reached for work keep thinking... why I can't hang along well with guys... and how should I do it.. and how should I do to make Eun Sun a good friend of mine... A conclusion was to display a smiley face when facing people there.. It became hard just when I was answered coldly as soon as I said hi smiling when I got in for work. Got a lot of chances talking to other people.... My only focus was to find where Eun Sun was.. Couldn't find her no matter what time it was.. Really can't see.. and worried what if... she is not at work today..Then. today's work really become worthless..
When like an hour or two passed, I saw Eun Sun passing by.. I really don't know.. she ain't my type and she ain't someone I like as a girl but my heart kinda beat and just get nervous... Maybe is the pressure that I want to make great friends with her... I saw her walking towards me so I just got busy with things... Just keep touching things... acting as if i'm working on sth.. and when I heard her saying hi to me.. I ignored as if I didn't hear her.. Then when she shouted Hey! I looked back..pretending as if I was shocked. Had a such nervous talk... that didn't last long... I regretted regretted repeating every words that passed. Shit you youngsub. Why be so man and use low tone to talk and never even smile. How can a girl approach when u do that. Shit you.
Chances came not so long after.. It was lunch time an hour after and had the chance to eat together with Eun Sun! AH YEAH.. We had a short conversation and suddenly Eun Sun asked me to sit in front her as I was sitting beside her.. I didn't know why but I joked to her whether she want to see my face so much. I pretended as if I was annoyed by her words then tried to move. Just then, the boss came in. He brought his lunch box and started eating with us too. The lunch time for us is splited for everybody. Like only two people eat together at the same time for about 30mins and when two people finish, they go back to work and the next two people come in. And out of all the slots, boss came in to join the meal with us. Wah.... damn.. As we were eating.. i tried to make things smooth and just talked to boss, eun sun and other girl who came in for a break. A little while later, boss took his earpiece and sat on the corner watching some show on his phone at the corner. I was alone with the boss in the room as the two other girls went in to the changing room to check their make-ups. I do not know why Korean girls check their make-ups so often. Like every single seconds... As I was just lying myself on to the table, Eun Sun came in and sat beside me... Then.. she took my phone and that was kinda cute.. She asked what's my password and I just told her the number. She flipped through and suddenly typed her number on my phone.. Wah really! Where is such girls who is so friendly and so approaching to guys. It was my role to take the courage and initiative to ask for her number to actually get to have at least a place for communication when she leaves her work this week... Damn nice.. So nice... I pretended as if this was nothing and just saved her number... Then on.. I felt like as if I was walking on the sky... Whatever things I hear and all the scoldings I didn't mind at all. Nothing could affect my mood.
Work ended like not knowing what was happening and somehow I managed to end work as the same time as Eun Sun did. Eun sun and jiwon were leaving together and the other two bosses were about to leave too. I didn't want to be seen as someone who follows girl... So, I waited for the guy bosses to walk to the train station. Eun Sun and Ji won walked but they were waiting for us.. I guess more like they were waiting for a chick magnet like me.
As we were walking down, Ji won wanted to drop by at Paris Baguette to buy egg tarts. I heard thats what the two of them always do after work.. Eating bread after work. They asked me to come along so I joined.(happily)
Had to make a farewell with Eun Sun as she was heading to a different direction..
As I was cycling through the night in the city... to home... I thought.... this thought came up just so suddenly but... considering that I am a stock... And mom and dad are the ones who invest on the stock called youngsub... What they were doing now was .... investing on the same stock that lost them a huge money... Who would do that... Only people who thinks its either this or dead... or who have huge faith on it would go for it... Mom and dad.. has faith on me...
Reached home and back to Eun Sun.. haha I searched her on Kakao talk which is like whatsapp, to see her photo. She was added on my phone and her profile picture was.... ha..... I almost spilled saliva... she was really pretty... I kept thought whether should I chat with her... thinking... what if ... I have different aim in getting closer to her.. What if I like her ... and like her as a girl..not a friend... That becomes a serious trouble.... I plucked up the courage and didn't think too much and just went on to talk to her.. If not today.. it would be no other day.. She didn't reply me till now but is okay.
I searched her on facebook too and found her.. She was really pretty and ha gorgeous.. had a lot of photos with her friends and almost all of em were girls...
And now...chatting with Amy and her friend Fang Fang... typing the story of my day... With Amy cheering me up.. I feel like I've got one such Eun Sun in SG.
Tomorrow will be one other day at work.. But I've got to make it better.
Work harder.. Work more seriously and work more flexibly. Don't make troubles with parents and kids... and please don't use low tone all and nvr smile... Who doesn't like people who smile... Stick to yourself... and hope tomorrow can be another step on my friendship with Eun Sun. Thank you...and..
Goodnight..
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