Another late midnight is here in Suwon. The family watching TV and some snoring in this late hours and waiting for the sweet dream to come.
Me, typing my stories out to remember few years later of what happened on this date. Maybe seeing those grammar errors I would laugh. And even the worries or pains I do have now will all be into laughter when I read back.
"Huhh!! What...What time is it!" I woke the family up rushingly asking for time. Mom, who was carried along with the hasty mood, quickly used the remote control to see the time on TV. It was 8:34 and made all of us relieved. Although I wouldn't be able to walk up the mountain again to read the papers but would still not be late for work. I quickly washed my hair and waited for mom as she wanted to make breakfast for me. After having a fulfilling one, I left home for work. Dad asked me a few questions about my work while having the dinner as he was curious of what I was doing.
The walk way to the bus stop was fresh. The weather wasn't as cold as yesterday. It was really just nice I can say. Moving myself lightly to the stop hoping for another amazing day. Although I had somewhat of unwanted day the yesterday as Kyungmin dind't wanna talk to me but it's another day. Today is no longer yesterday. Today can always be a different one or, I can make it, a different one. The bus that I usually take, from the electronic bus noticement board showed it would take 19 minutes. It was a long enough time to be late for work. While I was fidgeting in worries, the bus number 2-2 came and I saw a sign outside the bus that it goes to Suwon Station which is where I should alight. I got aboard on the bus and asked how long it would take, worrying this bus takes the totally longer route. He said it would only take about 10mins, and within 5minutes I reached the workplace. I prayed to hope for an enjoyable day and walked to the shop. I thought there wouldn't be full-timers as I came way earlier than time. However, all of them were there. Even Kyungmin who lives further than me reached a few minutes after I reached. Once again, she is really diligent. We changed up and I began talking to Kyungmin slowly to see her mood. When I was writing the diary last night, I overheard the Talk show that mom was watching at her room, which discussed about skills in communication. The speaker said that the key in communication is sympathy. When you gain someone's agree or say sth that everybody agrees, that becomes the best skill of communication. I kept reminding myself of that and talked to her every sec, thinking of that. Gaining someone's agree was hard. I had to say sth that will make everybody nod their head while making it a not boring one. She seemed to be better off than ytd. I guess I was right. She must be at the peak of her period ytd and got better today.
It was just the two of us at the event hall. The manager friend came late for time. Before 10.30 where the mall was to be opened, the girls beside my shop talked to me. One of the two girls was the real pretty one I said yesterday. As I called her nuna and the other girl told me that she is not older than me but of the same age. She was 1994 but I was 1995 but born early in 1995. Things always get confusing this way. Korean government during my time, allowed those who were born early like Jan or Feb to enter school a year earlier. This made all the confusions. Now, me staying abroad, I made friends with all Koreans who were 94 and 95. Things became really ambiguous. The younger girl was 1995 which was same age as me. There was a moment of silence and I kept thinking of sympathy.
Must must get their agree and laughter. So I told them why not three of us all make friends. I thought that could get at least pathetic laughter or sth... But silent overwhelmed again and they just nodded their head. I decided to focus on work.
The manager friend rushed to the event hall as she came late. The manager friend and Kyungmin only tallked among themselves. I felt left out as they laughed at each other and never join me in. Wanting to join the conversation, I joined in between them and asked what's so funny and tell me too. The manager friend said she did not want to make so much noise and at the moment I intervened in, they began to work. It was like as soon as I joined, they stopped talking and all the smiles were gone. I felt like I intervened at the wrong time.
Customers were less than yesterday. As most of them want to rest at home on Sunday, there were really less people. When 3 o clock came, like usual days were still busy. There were a lot of times all of us being silent but I didn't really bother speaking out to break the ice. There was this thought in myself that anyways today is the last day. Such bad thought in me while everyday should be of 100% effort put in.
There were times where I felt I really am someone sucking at conversation. Like at times when even the manager friend seemed bit annoyed. It's not really about conversation but hmm like she was angry when I was slow at reacting. These few days of work in here really made me display some of my weaknesses. Even when I was talking to the Hyung at the polo shop, I even made him angered too when I was saying all in a joke. I guess i really am not good at communication skills. Hope I can learn them..
As the work ended and separated with Kyungmin.. I was so sad to have made the last farewell in regrets. She once told me that I talked too much that we talked everything we should in two days. I admit that I talked real a lot as we stayed for 10 hours tgt and I kept talking to her. But this shows my weakness. Unless I ask about person's life or those basic questions, I can't carry on a conversation like how normal people do so happily with their friends. Such weakness...
Leaving the shop after getting my pay, I felt more like hmm.. more of sadness but no regrets as I learned. But should be sad to still be at this point while I could have grown more. Walking up the staircase to the bus stop, thinking of what I should do tmr... Becoming unemployed again tmr...
Reached home and the family welcomed me. The atmosphere seemed better as mom and dad were talking. I found a spot for myself and began eating all those food mom provided me.
A grateful..but also a sorrowful day...
Learn hard Lee.
Good night.
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